Hello,
So, I'll start off by saying that me and my girl have been together for about 10 years and our sex life has always been vanilla. She's only ever been with me sexually, so she's pretty inexperienced, but she's never expressed an interest in anyone else. I found out about 4 years ago I was sterile and couldn't have kids. I fell into a deep depression for a while. I've always had low self esteem and this just shot it all to hell. I have an average size cock but I always felt like it was a little on the small side. I felt so inadequate compared my idea of what "Alpha-Males" should be, giant cocks that shoot loads of cum.
One day I was watching the movie "Unfaithful" with Diane Lane. It was super hot watching her cheat on her husband and it really got my fiance going. I started to wonder if she may want to be with someone else. I talked with her about it and she dismissed it right away. I honestly believe her, but I feel like she doesn't realize what's she's missing because she's never had another man/cock in her life.
I hate myself for having these feelings, but I continue further down the cuckold fantasy hole, reading fiction and non-fictional stories about it. I look further and get into porn involving cheating wives. I definitely get into some of the humiliation, but I draw the line at any bi-sexual or clean up fetishes. I really get into the thought of another man turning my vanilla fiance into a sexual beast.
I introduced the fantasy over the years, talking dirty to the fiance, mainly stories involving setting up a sexual massage or taking her to strip club and having a stripper with a big dick seduce her. I could tell it turned her on, but she continually denied it and claims that "vanilla" is more her speed. I somehow still don't believe her, even after a few years of having this fantasy.
I'm at the point now where I need this fantasy...even in my head to have sex with her. I just don't feel good enough, and I honestly wished she would break out of this vanilla slump and tell me something naughty...like she wishes my dick was bigger or she wished I would cum buckets...don't think it will ever happen.
I did step her closer in this direction though. I put on a porn of guys with giant cocks stroking themselves and having massive cumshots on for her to watch and although she acted like she hated it, when I felt her pussy it was soaking wet. I felt like it was a success.
I'll sum up: This fantasy is almost a necessity for any sexual activity (solo or otherwise) but I honestly don't want her to be with another man, I'd prefer this to stay in fantasy land. I just wish my fiance would share these fantasies too.
Thanks for letting me share on this wonderful blog, it feels good to get it out in the open. Here are some pics of her.
Derrick
