Hello,
This is the third installment of CTTW. I don’t want to get into the habit of recapping every previous posting, so I encourage you to read from the beginning if you have not already done so. By now you should be exercising SOME influence over your man on a more regular basis and be more comfortable doing so. You are probably enjoying having your way, being able to get him to do this or that for you and you likely see the possibilities going forward. Hopefully you are engaging in a bit more people-watching and writing down your observations and thoughts in your journal on a daily basis. As far as activities go, you should have at least broached the subject of and possible engaged in ass-play (his). If you are really committed and progressing nicely, you have made him cum “too quickly” then got him to go down on you afterward. If you are doing these things, you have accomplished far more than you can imagine and are well on your way. If you have not tried these recommendations but are truly interested in exploring cuckolding, I encourage you to go back and read the earlier posts. If you have, this installment will help you turn up the heat and keep the momentum you have established. It is important to know that you are either moving forward, or losing ground. There is no in-between at this stage. Let’s get down to business.
In the first post, we spoke of three motivating factors that can be leveraged: sexual drive, humiliation/peer pressure and calling his bluff. We focused on sexual drive, which of course is the main source of your power. Let’s talk now about humiliation. Obviously, any time a man has to (or chooses to) tolerate his woman being with another man, there is an element of humiliation. Typically, women struggle to understand how this can be a good or desirable thing for a man. Some things you just have to accept. Who can really explain electricity? But we all throw the switch and benefit from it every day. Such is the case here. Cuckold men are turned on by being humiliated. Obviously, it needs to be done thoughtfully, slowly turning up the heat, as we have done on all fronts, but you need to understand and accept that humiliation is not meanness, or abuse, it is stimulation and play. Let’s introduce some ways to incorporate and benefit from it.
If you have followed the recommendations I have made, you may have already engaged in ass-play with your man and possibly gotten him to go down on you after he came in you (a manifestation of cum-play). There is an element of intrinsic humiliation to both these activities and it can be leveraged further by referencing them after the fact, eventually teasing him about his participation in them. Tell him how surprised you were that he actually went down on you after making such a mess down there and how much it turned you on. Describe how you could not help but notice him subtly (or not so subtly) pushing back on you as you played with his ass.
Now let’s introduce another activity that can play out in many ways, him performing for you. Women are accustomed to being seen as objects of sexual interest that turn-on their partner. Men typically do not have this conveyed to them in any way. Changing that dynamic can be fun and beneficial. The easiest way to start, which does include a distinct element of humiliation, is to get him to masturbate for you. This might seem daunting at first but as always, I will help you get there. You may begin to see a trend here; I have referred to it as turning the tables. Turning the tables is a great way to get him to do things he has never done. Has he ever encouraged you to touch yourself in front of him. You were probably pretty self-conscious about it initially, and perhaps still are reluctant to do so. He will feel the same way. But fair is fair.
However reluctant he might be, there is no good argument for why it is reasonable for him to ask this of you while being unwilling to do so himself. Here are the specific steps to getting him to masturbate for you, a form of performing. First set aside some time to be intimate with him, some dedicated play time. As that time approaches, tell him how much you are looking forward to it. Send him little text messages as suggested before to engage his sexual drive. Then as you get closer, send him a text saying you want your foreplay to include watching each other masturbate. Another good way to introduce this activity is to seize on an opportunity when he is asking you what your fantasies are. Let him push and pry a bit, then “reluctantly” tell him what you have been wanting to tell him all along, that you like the idea of masturbating in front of each other. One way or the other, get him to agree to you both masturbating for each other during your special time. Once you are engaging in this way, make sure you convey clearly, verbally and otherwise, how much it is turning you on to watch him. Demonstrate that you are so engrossed in watching him that you slowly back away from actually touching yourself. If he slows down or balks, just push hard, telling him not to stop. Keep encouraging him. Finally, when things are heated up enough, tell him you want to see him cum. Say whatever you need to say to keep him riled up and push him over the top. Getting him to cum for you is critical. Doing so will have established the first example of him performing for you, something you will leverage to great benefit down the road. It is also an example of you taking control of his sexuality. Having him masturbate in lieu of having sex with you while you are free to have earth shattering sex with someone else is a humiliating, empowering element of any cuckold relationship. Get there by introducing mutual masturbatory performance, then by morphing it into him masturbating for you whenever you require it of him.
Another example of turning the table on him which introduces a high level of humiliation and can be leveraged later is as follows: Engage him in a conversation about you going down on him. Steer the conversation to the subject of deep-throating. If you are capable of this, talk about how you were first able to accomplish it. If you are not, better still. Ask all sorts of questions about it. Ask him if he has ever experienced it. Set him at ease by telling him you don’t need to know who accomplished it for him; you just want to know if he liked it. If he has never experienced it, ask him if it appeals to him. Ask him what appeals to him about it. Tell him that prior lovers were always pressuring you to do it or learn to do it, but you never did. Keep the conversation going for a time. If you have had some success in doing this with your partner, tell him you wish you were better at it. Tell him you are not confident you can get there. Try to navigate the discussion to a place where he is encouraging you, suggesting that he believes you could learn to do it if you wanted to, were patient, and worked at it.
Again, reiterate your doubt that you would be able to do so. Tell him, “it is easy for him to say! He is not the one doing it!”. Finally, tell him you are willing to try to learn by practicing on a small toy but with one caveat: he will have to do so as well. He will likely balk at the idea. Act surprised as to why. After-all, it is only a rubber toy. Besides, if it really is as do-able as he says, then he should be willing to prove it. This particular activity is one that may take some time. There is something critical you need to know about this journey and the mental make-up of cuckolds. There is an internal struggle going on in them. Often, they will balk at a request or outright refuse to engage in it initially. Then later at a time when their sex drive is particularly high, they will revisit the activity in their mind, often ending up fantasizing about that very thing. Go so far as to order a small dildo online and have it sent to your house. In fact, buy two, one that is small and one that is quite realistic. Then give it some time and see if he brings up the subject again.
Increase the chances of that happening by going down on him. When the subject does come up in the form of conversation, tell him you have a confession, that you bought a toy to practice on. He will be very excited to hear this and likely ask if you have tried it. Tell him you have. Perhaps you ACTUALLY have. He will probably want to see you try. Again, acting doubtful and reluctant for him to see you try. Finally agree, but only if he will try. Have fun with it. Keep it light. You may want to have a few drinks at this point to loosen up a bit. If you talk about this long enough, it will not seem so foreign or crazy, even to him. Eventually, you want to get him to agree, then bring about a setting where you are competing to see who can put it in the furthest and keep it in the longest. Engage his competitive nature and praise him for doing better than you. Conclude by telling him you will keep working on it. Then put the toy aside and have some great love-making. (quick safety tip: buy a toy with balls or a base on it so you don’t have to worry about pushing it in too far).
Now for the humiliation and leveraging part. Obviously by now you two have talked about the new world you are exploring, the world of cuckolding. It is likely still a difficult subject to speak about openly, but you need to try to reference it more and more frequently. One way to keep an iron in the fire is to send regular text messages. Here is one place where you can engage in the humiliation that demonstrates your control and which he craves without worrying about whether you can pull it off or will break character. Send him a text message telling him how much you are enjoying the play and the direction you have been heading. He will likely ask what you like about it. Tell him that for one, you are really turned on by a side of him you never knew was there. He will definitely want to engage you on this subject, want to get more detail.
Let him press. Then tell him that you never anticipated how much fun it would be to have a husband/boyfriend who eats his own cum and sucks such a mean dick. Shocking? Yes, it is! He will be surprised to hear you talking that way. He may go quiet for a bit. Ask him if the cat has his tongue. Continue to tease him. Tell him you look forward to the next time. Tell him you can’t imagine what your friends would say if they knew. Then reassure him that it is your little secret, but that you definitely expect repeat performances. Ask him if that is understood. When he says, “yes,” you will know that you have him.
At this point you have proven that you can get him to do things he would have only recently scoffed at, things you yourself had a hard time imagining him doing. Where you take it from here is up to you. You may rest assured, I will help you with ideas and suggestions in future posts. The point is that you have established control. Next post we will be talking about Making it Real and Bargaining, two approaches that help you advance easily and naturally. Additionally, we will speak about the peer pressure part of humiliation/peer pressure, one of our three primary motivators.
Cuckold Coach - CCoach@mail.com
